Oct. 23rd, 2005

i miss you so much, tonight. i miss every one of you. and when i close my eyes, almost, i can reach out, i can feel you there, far away. whether you are in Albuquerque or Oregon or San Francisco or Dublin or just down on 30th street. living your life, day by day, without me. you kiss her good morning. you go to the shops. you dance in the black light. you fall asleep early. you chop wood for your fire. you tie back your hair.

and afterward, you all go to coffee, and everyone laughs at your jokes.

and you've changed, you've changed. you've cut your hair, you've grown a beard, you've changed your style, you've changed your walk. you're older now -- we're both older, now. but i -- i would still know you, if i saw you tomorrow. i would still know you if we passed on the street. you are in all my stories. you are in all the songs. i could never forget you, scattered fragments of my heart.

but have i changed the smallest thing? is anything different at all? a half-remembered fragment, like a trap -- the smell of shampoo, a familiar turn of phrase, a stranger's gesture? the slightest pull, like gravity? when you close your eyes, can you feel me, too?



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